2nd Beta HCG is in!

 I went for repeat blood work yesterday. I hear from the nurse first thing this morning.  My 19dpo beta was 489.  So this means my beta's are doubling nicely.  I go back on Monday for a repeat and we should see it over 1000 by then.  My first ultrasound will be on March 2 at 7w4d.  My First OB appointment has been booked for March 15 at 9w3d

I am feeling pretty good.  I will admit to having moments of fear.  Each good test result is reassuring of course but we all know a positive pee stick doesn't automatically mean a living baby to take home.  Overall I am currently feeling positive.

I am still having several WOW moments.  A state of disbelief that I am even pregnant at all.

I had a little talk with Gavin the other day.  To let him know that even though we have a little rainbow on the way he will always be loved by me and loved as much as Brennan or any other child that comes into our lives.  I am sure he knows this but I needed to tell him too.  I still think of him each and every day, I don't ever want that to ever end. 

 It's been a LONG time (1 year 1 month and 2 days to be exact) since I've felt this positive about life it's almost like this pregnancy has lit a tiny candle at the end of a dark dark path.  I can see it and with each passing week it grows brighter and brighter.