I don't think I would be considered normal if I didn't have some concerns and reservations about this pregnancy. I do feel relatively calm though, I am sure I could be lots worse. I am however still trying to control what I can (part of my personality).
B and I had a play date this afternoon with a friend. I decided it won't be much longer before I will not be able to go solo with B. My nearly 40lb preschooler can be a handful and hard/heavy to get up into his car seat. I know the baby is only the size of a small seed and is not putting any pressure on my cervix but I still don't want to take any chances.
It's going to be hard but necessary. I am sure there will be other changes to be made as time progresses and I will do whatever I can do to avoid a repeat of Gavin's early birth.
On our way to our play date I was playing one of my favorite bl songs on the stereo. A little secret, it's all I listen to when it's just me or just me and B in the car. I sing to my baby Gavin. By the time we exited off the highway a few tears had slid from my eyes. Sadness, fear. I sent a silent plea to God to keep this baby safe and let this one be our take home baby.
1 comment:
You're not alone on the playing bl songs and singing to them in the car... I totally do it too and it usually makes me cry. We're praying this is your take home baby too. Hugz!
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