The first day back at work was ok. I really have to wonder what exactly my other person did while I was gone. There was LOTS of work to come back to and of course my other person is off till Wednesday. Oh well. Keep me busy I guess.
Only one person in my department asked how I was. I said I was fine. I don't know what they were told, I guess it doesn't really matter. One person from central asked what my surgery was for. T is a mentally challenged man who delivers the mail around the firm. I had to say "I would rather not say if that is ok" poor T.
I had a couple moments of deep sadness where I needed to choke back tears. Being back at work makes the reality of not being pregnant much more real. I had hopes and they were dashed yet again. I had marked every four weeks into my calender, all my appointments. Everything had to be deleted. Just like last time :(
After work I headed to the lab for my weekly hcg draw. The place was a chaotic mess. Several preggo's doing their gtt's and way too many kids!!
When it was my turn the tech said to me "old hcg test"
I said to her "unfortunately it's going the wrong way"
She said "it's going down?"
I said "Yeah I had a d & c, we have to watch it go back to normal, I'll be here every week"
She said "What's normal?"
I said "Less than 5"
She said "Oh"
Yeah lady that is right not everyone who gets and hcg draw is happily pregnant :(
Sometimes life just sucks. I had better go to bed so I can get up and repeat today's drudgery tomorrow.
2 comments:
:'( thinking of you. I am sorry reality sucks sometimes. Sending you love and strength to get through this hard time. <3
I went for my hcg test tonight and the lab was quiet but of course as I walked out, there was a preggo getting ready to do her GTT. Very glad I didn't have to sit and watch her, I would have lost it completely.
Sometimes life really sucks and too bad it seems to be cramming in the sucky moments these days for a lot of us.
Post a Comment